I used to ...

1. Smile
all the time. It was almost like the smile was plastered on my face, like the joker. When walking on the street, random people would ask me what I was smiling about. Nothing, I usually told them. That smile, it always attracted attention. It was a great conversation starter- and a great pick up line too.

In boarding school, I remember being almost punished a couple of times cos I refused to stop smiling. The seniors would call me for no reason and ask me to frown. I only smiled harder. Usually they ended up buying me chin-chin.

For the one year I was in college in Nigeria, in my fellowship, there was no question as to what group/subgroup I was to be placed in. Follow up and Ushering.
Then something happened. I don't even recall losing it, it just wasn't there anymore.
The reality hit me when one of the doctors I worked with over the summer said, "wow! she's smiling. you never smile".
"really?" I asked.
then my pastor said something along those lines, and I knew I had lost my smile.

I'm now consciously working on getting it back.
Now that you've been warned, don't be surprised if you see me smiling sheepishly at you. I don't think you're hot, I'm just trying to get my smile back.


2. be cool
now I'm razz. there, I said it!
you would imagine that when you come to yankee you become "creamer", not in my case. I think I'm razzer than I left naija, I'm still deciding on whom to blame.

My habits, my music selection, I just know. In Nigeria I would never ask for food at a gathering/party. Now, I only go to organizational meetings after I've been assured there'll be food (and good food too) and at parties, I reach for the take-away plate without shame.

I don't think listening to Nigerian music like Asa, Naeto C, P-square even 9ice is razz, but when I'm mouthing off to "Somebody call my name" and intermittently letting out "showky bobo", "sempe!" then we clearly have a problem. I didn't even like daddy showkey in Naija. Gawd! what happened to me?

3. be a lepa.
now I'm handing back my lepa pass in exchange for my orobo tag. This probably deserves a post on its own, but I recently stepped on the scales (since my roommate now has a scale in the house) and the evidence was there. see, I don't usually keep track of my weight, and my clothes have been fooling me. I still fit perfectly into my size 3 jeans and small tops, even though my size 1 jeans are becoming a little tight. So I didn't know how it happened.

Anyways, I just discovered that I've crossed my panic-if-you-get-to-this-weight! weight. Today the scales read 140Ibs. I screamed.
140Ibs might look small, but a couple of years ago it looked so far off. My friends are not helping matters either. My closest friend in school says I need to gain weight, my girlfriends say otherwise, some say I'm ok. the scales insist that I'm 140 Ibs.
I hereby declare that I'm on going on the diet! the thought is laughable, even to me!


you guys wanna share yours?