So , I realised that I titled this blog "Medico Blues", and I actually haven't written anything about medicine since. Come back! Don't run away, I promise I won't bore you.
People, it's a war out there! Really, this is the present day 300. and it has been going on for ages. Spent the last two weeks learning about the education and miseducation of a T- lymphocyte, which are the armed forces of the body.
Now for the past two weeks, I've moved on to bigger and better things. Oh wait! Bacteria and viruses are not bigger neither are they better. I think at the end of these two weeks, I would become a serious germophobe by the time I done. Infact, I've purchased a good antibacterial hand sanitizer which I have been using generously. Since I've adopted blogville folks as my new virtual family, I just have to share these small must-knows with you.
Ladies! Ladies!! Ladies!!!, u absolutely HAVE to wipe from the front to the back, and NEVER in the reverse, cos u taking bacteria from ur GI tract (Anus) to the Vajajay, and the bacteria from both sides are not that compatible- yes, bacteria from BOTH areas.
Fellas! Fellas!! Fellas!!! Please if you think you have carried 'gono", tell your partners, at least for the sake of their unborn babies to come. And you guys know you know when you have it because… women are spared all that hassle- they don't know when they have it. Gonorrhea can get into the baby's eyes on the way through the birth canal and can cause irreversable blindness,. I don't know if they do this in naija.
Your doctor can tell when you've been giving BJ's and generally sticking your mouth where they shouldn't be.
People! People!! People!!! Antibiotics don't cure headaches. Actually my teacher is nigerian, so I know he was referring to nigerians when he was talking about people who self-medicate with antibiotics for everything! If you take antibiotics when you don't need it, the bacteria in your body become resistant to it, and when you do need it, they start singing MC hammer in your body: can't touch this!, Moreover improperly administered dose of anitbiotics can kill you, just ask the family of Katie Tyra, they can tell you more.
By this time, I'm guessing you would have looked up and realized that my blog name has changed. Yes, but the contents still remain the same. More like going from NEPA to PHCN or from "The nigerian Police Force" to "The Nigerian Police".
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Monday, October 22, 2007
Her first Kiss
Boy meets girl, boy likes girl. They go out on a romantic date, and at the end of the date he takes her back home, and at the door, he leans across and gently presses a kiss to her lips waiting for her invitation. She has been waiting for it, and also leans in. He deepens the kiss, and she kisses him back , akwardly at first, since this is her first time. The moment feels so right, she bends her knees….
That was how she imagined her first kiss until that child predator-Godwin- ruined it for her!. Needless to say, it couldn't have gone more horribly wrong. I mean, he could have scarred her for life! Here's how it happened:
It was in computer school- she didn't even know why she bothered attending the stupid school. However, she had just finished high school, and was quite jobless in the months that followed graduation. Computer school was just a way to get out of the house, and do something. she couldn't even remember the name of the school sef- it was that bad. She had this teacher called Godwin. He must have been one of those university students who were at home because of the strike. There's no point saying he wasn't cute- cos he was. She just didn’t see guys like that . As far as she was concerned, he was her teacher. He couldn't be cute, he couldn't be sexy, he could only be the teacher.
Of course she knew Godwin liked her, everybody knew, what with the furtive glances he kept giving her, and the tone of his voice whenever he talked to her. However, everybody knew the assistant manager also liked him. She must have been slightly older or right about his age, that was like almost 10 years older than she was. she was just a miserly 15 at that time. Naïve, innocent, and ... Naïve. Never kissed a guy before. Actually, kissing ranked high on her list of disgusting things to do.
It was going to be her last exam she would take with Godwin being the instructor. There were two parts to the exam, the written part and the practical part. She finished the actual design and Godwin came to check it.
He was like," You didn't do this, minus 10 points, you didn't highlight, minus another 10…"
By the time he was done, he had "minused" like 25 points , out of llike 50 points. Being the over achiever that she was, she was naturally pissed off,and wasn't hiding it. She slammed the mouse on the computer.
He then said, "come and take your written exam in my office"
When she got into the office, he was sort of seating at the edge of the table, he then goes," why are you frowning?"
In her head she was like: Duh!
He pulled her over to himself and was like "is it because of the exam, oya, what do u want to score"
she told him, " I want to score what my work deserves "
Before you could say Jack Robinson, Godwin's lips were firmly planted on her lips. She slams her mouth shut. For where? Godwin was a pro! he bit gently on her lower lip,and as she opened her mouth for a fraction of a second to shout yee! Godwin had slipped his tongue into her mouth and his hands were fightling with the buttons on her blouse.
She felt so horribly disgusted! To make matters worse, the dimwit didn't have the common sense to lock the door, and she had to experience the embarassment of someone walking in on him while he was defiling her! Needless to say,she was thoroughly embarassed.
She was a kiss virgin dammit! and was saving it for Tyson Beckford!!
That was how she imagined her first kiss until that child predator-Godwin- ruined it for her!. Needless to say, it couldn't have gone more horribly wrong. I mean, he could have scarred her for life! Here's how it happened:
It was in computer school- she didn't even know why she bothered attending the stupid school. However, she had just finished high school, and was quite jobless in the months that followed graduation. Computer school was just a way to get out of the house, and do something. she couldn't even remember the name of the school sef- it was that bad. She had this teacher called Godwin. He must have been one of those university students who were at home because of the strike. There's no point saying he wasn't cute- cos he was. She just didn’t see guys like that . As far as she was concerned, he was her teacher. He couldn't be cute, he couldn't be sexy, he could only be the teacher.
Of course she knew Godwin liked her, everybody knew, what with the furtive glances he kept giving her, and the tone of his voice whenever he talked to her. However, everybody knew the assistant manager also liked him. She must have been slightly older or right about his age, that was like almost 10 years older than she was. she was just a miserly 15 at that time. Naïve, innocent, and ... Naïve. Never kissed a guy before. Actually, kissing ranked high on her list of disgusting things to do.
It was going to be her last exam she would take with Godwin being the instructor. There were two parts to the exam, the written part and the practical part. She finished the actual design and Godwin came to check it.
He was like," You didn't do this, minus 10 points, you didn't highlight, minus another 10…"
By the time he was done, he had "minused" like 25 points , out of llike 50 points. Being the over achiever that she was, she was naturally pissed off,and wasn't hiding it. She slammed the mouse on the computer.
He then said, "come and take your written exam in my office"
When she got into the office, he was sort of seating at the edge of the table, he then goes," why are you frowning?"
In her head she was like: Duh!
He pulled her over to himself and was like "is it because of the exam, oya, what do u want to score"
she told him, " I want to score what my work deserves "
Before you could say Jack Robinson, Godwin's lips were firmly planted on her lips. She slams her mouth shut. For where? Godwin was a pro! he bit gently on her lower lip,and as she opened her mouth for a fraction of a second to shout yee! Godwin had slipped his tongue into her mouth and his hands were fightling with the buttons on her blouse.
She felt so horribly disgusted! To make matters worse, the dimwit didn't have the common sense to lock the door, and she had to experience the embarassment of someone walking in on him while he was defiling her! Needless to say,she was thoroughly embarassed.
She was a kiss virgin dammit! and was saving it for Tyson Beckford!!
Wednesday, October 17, 2007
People who Blog are jobless!
That's what my friend told me today. I was jejely reading boorish's blog in class, and I was going to show him something I thought he should see. my bad.
I'm all for letting people have their opinions and all that ish, but if you have such an opinion, it just ...
I don't say people that watch sports are jobless, I don't say people that watch Anime are jobless(even though a part of me thinks so), I don't say
"...who wants to hear about how xxx your life is..."
carlang wants to, so does bighead, and owumi
Is it that my fault that I like to write, and I choose to share what I write with a whole bunch of people. I tried to explain that I don't write a diary, I just write. Not to say there's anything wrong with an online diary, but he just wasn't listening.
Then I thought of all my favorite bloggers (you know who you are) and I got angry (talk about righteous anger!). On the real though I don't care too much for putting people down because of their preferences and for no reason whatsoever.
What do u think? Are bloggers jobless people?
I'm all for letting people have their opinions and all that ish, but if you have such an opinion, it just ...
I don't say people that watch sports are jobless, I don't say people that watch Anime are jobless(even though a part of me thinks so), I don't say
"...who wants to hear about how xxx your life is..."
carlang wants to, so does bighead, and owumi
Is it that my fault that I like to write, and I choose to share what I write with a whole bunch of people. I tried to explain that I don't write a diary, I just write. Not to say there's anything wrong with an online diary, but he just wasn't listening.
Then I thought of all my favorite bloggers (you know who you are) and I got angry (talk about righteous anger!). On the real though I don't care too much for putting people down because of their preferences and for no reason whatsoever.
What do u think? Are bloggers jobless people?
Tuesday, October 16, 2007
I must have pulled this out of my a**, but...
By now, you would have realized that I have given up posting "In Da House". I'm tired of it. If you want to know how it ends, send me a message and I'll send it to you by email.
Rather, I want to blog about one of my teachers. I actually wrote this entry yesterday, and the confirmation that I had to blog about it came today. I was talking with one of my friends, and he said he wonders why students make a big deal of their female teachers sleeping with them. They are supposed to consider themselves lucky, according to him.
This just reminded me about male teachers making passes at me. I am usually smart enough to brush it off, but here was one that took me years to figure out.
For some reason I feel the need to blog about one particular teacher of mine-mr M. ( sadly, enough, I'm still too scared to mention his name, cos I'm still secretly scared of him.
Here is a short bio on the guy: r. M should have been in his 50s at that time-roughly about 6 years ago. No one really knew his age,but he was clearly an old man. Mr. M taught chemistry, and he was good at what he did. You could NEVER fail WAEC chemistry if Mr. M was your teacher. He was also Ghanian. He was so smart, he knew something about every random thing. Sounds like the ideal teacher? Wait, everyone was scared of him. He was so eccentric, and could turn on you at any moment.
At that time, I was in 12th grade and I was 14 going on 15. I liked my teacher, but my teacher liked me. I knew not.
One day, I went to his lab to help him set up for our exams, actually it was three of us- two other guys and myself. After a couple of mins, Mr.M decided he needed a smoke and set out to get one. Right before he left however, my high school crush-hereafter to be referred to as Crush- comes in. We(four of us, students) leave the lab, unknown to us, the other two dudes came back.
Mr M. comes back and doesn't find me and Crush in the lab, and then he goes ballistic! Calling Crush all sorts of names in the book, saying " HE CAME HERE, AND TOOK THE GIRL AWAY"- in his fiercest ghanian voice.
After I finish high school, Mr. M persuades me to write the SATs, I do. He writes me the best recommendation EVER, and every time I come to school for my transcripts, he personally goes to the school office to make sure it is processed hastily. I must have made those visits to school like 6 times. Each time, Mr. M insists on giving me transport fare. I collect it cos I'm scared he's going to go Kamikazee on me. At first he gives me $50, it costs $10 to get me home, @30 at the most. Then he gives me $100, then $200, then $500. When I pass the SATs (with the best score in the country at that time- He told me that), he insists on giving me "a gift", I refuse his offer of a bottle of wine, then he says he would buy me a wrist watch. No shaking.
On my birthday, he gives my sister $2000 and a birthday card to give to me. At this point, I am terrified, and I stop going to school because I don't know how to refuse his 'transport fare".
When I finally got into school in the US, I go to school to tell him. He then gives me his address and says I should come and "visit" him at home. I said ok… and then I disappeared.
I told this story to one of my friends and he said ;'duh! He liked you". I don’t want to believe this cos I still want to hold on to the idea of Mr. M being the best teacher ever. I haven't been able to tell anyone this until recently, cos I don't want to believe anything that bad about him.
I wonder what would have happened if I had gone to "visit" him at home. Would he have made an actual pass at me? Tried to touch me? Eww! I can't even conjure up the image!
PS: this is the abbreviated version of the story.
Rather, I want to blog about one of my teachers. I actually wrote this entry yesterday, and the confirmation that I had to blog about it came today. I was talking with one of my friends, and he said he wonders why students make a big deal of their female teachers sleeping with them. They are supposed to consider themselves lucky, according to him.
This just reminded me about male teachers making passes at me. I am usually smart enough to brush it off, but here was one that took me years to figure out.
For some reason I feel the need to blog about one particular teacher of mine-mr M. ( sadly, enough, I'm still too scared to mention his name, cos I'm still secretly scared of him.
Here is a short bio on the guy: r. M should have been in his 50s at that time-roughly about 6 years ago. No one really knew his age,but he was clearly an old man. Mr. M taught chemistry, and he was good at what he did. You could NEVER fail WAEC chemistry if Mr. M was your teacher. He was also Ghanian. He was so smart, he knew something about every random thing. Sounds like the ideal teacher? Wait, everyone was scared of him. He was so eccentric, and could turn on you at any moment.
At that time, I was in 12th grade and I was 14 going on 15. I liked my teacher, but my teacher liked me. I knew not.
One day, I went to his lab to help him set up for our exams, actually it was three of us- two other guys and myself. After a couple of mins, Mr.M decided he needed a smoke and set out to get one. Right before he left however, my high school crush-hereafter to be referred to as Crush- comes in. We(four of us, students) leave the lab, unknown to us, the other two dudes came back.
Mr M. comes back and doesn't find me and Crush in the lab, and then he goes ballistic! Calling Crush all sorts of names in the book, saying " HE CAME HERE, AND TOOK THE GIRL AWAY"- in his fiercest ghanian voice.
After I finish high school, Mr. M persuades me to write the SATs, I do. He writes me the best recommendation EVER, and every time I come to school for my transcripts, he personally goes to the school office to make sure it is processed hastily. I must have made those visits to school like 6 times. Each time, Mr. M insists on giving me transport fare. I collect it cos I'm scared he's going to go Kamikazee on me. At first he gives me $50, it costs $10 to get me home, @30 at the most. Then he gives me $100, then $200, then $500. When I pass the SATs (with the best score in the country at that time- He told me that), he insists on giving me "a gift", I refuse his offer of a bottle of wine, then he says he would buy me a wrist watch. No shaking.
On my birthday, he gives my sister $2000 and a birthday card to give to me. At this point, I am terrified, and I stop going to school because I don't know how to refuse his 'transport fare".
When I finally got into school in the US, I go to school to tell him. He then gives me his address and says I should come and "visit" him at home. I said ok… and then I disappeared.
I told this story to one of my friends and he said ;'duh! He liked you". I don’t want to believe this cos I still want to hold on to the idea of Mr. M being the best teacher ever. I haven't been able to tell anyone this until recently, cos I don't want to believe anything that bad about him.
I wonder what would have happened if I had gone to "visit" him at home. Would he have made an actual pass at me? Tried to touch me? Eww! I can't even conjure up the image!
PS: this is the abbreviated version of the story.
Monday, October 15, 2007
Monday at last!
That's right. I'm excited about monday. Quite odd, you may say, but it's true. you see, monday is usually exam day. I'm not excited about the exams, but this is the only day I have nothing to study. I read so much this weekend, my head hurts. It's quite scary to think that I would have to be doing this for another 3-4 years. jeez!
On a lighter note, I was going to blog about reality tv, but I really don't feel up to it.
I'm outties!
On a lighter note, I was going to blog about reality tv, but I really don't feel up to it.
I'm outties!
Wednesday, October 10, 2007
Falling in Love on Blogspot
Not being able to post is taking a toll on me men, this has to be the most random post I'll ever make.
why didn't I discover blogspot earlier ehn? Now I'm up to my neck in work, and it seems like there's a thousand and one blogs out there, waiting to be read. In my free time... I take that back, despite my busy schedule, I now log on to blogspot (several times during the day), just to read people's blog.
so, I was on blogspot one day like that, and I was checking out some babe's blog, that's how I said lemme check her comments, so I clicked on the comment, and then I was on someone else's blog, then I clicked on his comments, and I was on another person's blog, then i checked the comments, then I was on another blog, like that ..... If you differentiate the sum of the blogs I went through, with respect to the first blog I was on, then you now integrate partially within the appriopriate limits, .... dang! (the days of calculus!)
ok! so what I'm trying to say is this, I ended up on someone's blog. ok, it's a guy. omigosh! the dude is a baaaaaaaad writer, I mean he's just awesome. I'm a sucker for good writing skills, in my opinion it sort of means one is a good conversationalist, if not better.
Anyways, I did a Sherlock Holmes on him, i.e his blog and liked what I saw. Very soon, I started stalking his blog. I think I might even have left a comment or two. Like the crack addict I've become, I check everytime on blogspot to see if he has updated. And ... (let me get a handkerchief)... and he has refused to update his blog. Now I'm suffering from withdrawal symptomps!
I feel jilted! how dare he! someone better tell him to update asap or else, I'mma leave his behind for another...
why didn't I discover blogspot earlier ehn? Now I'm up to my neck in work, and it seems like there's a thousand and one blogs out there, waiting to be read. In my free time... I take that back, despite my busy schedule, I now log on to blogspot (several times during the day), just to read people's blog.
so, I was on blogspot one day like that, and I was checking out some babe's blog, that's how I said lemme check her comments, so I clicked on the comment, and then I was on someone else's blog, then I clicked on his comments, and I was on another person's blog, then i checked the comments, then I was on another blog, like that ..... If you differentiate the sum of the blogs I went through, with respect to the first blog I was on, then you now integrate partially within the appriopriate limits, .... dang! (the days of calculus!)
ok! so what I'm trying to say is this, I ended up on someone's blog. ok, it's a guy. omigosh! the dude is a baaaaaaaad writer, I mean he's just awesome. I'm a sucker for good writing skills, in my opinion it sort of means one is a good conversationalist, if not better.
Anyways, I did a Sherlock Holmes on him, i.e his blog and liked what I saw. Very soon, I started stalking his blog. I think I might even have left a comment or two. Like the crack addict I've become, I check everytime on blogspot to see if he has updated. And ... (let me get a handkerchief)... and he has refused to update his blog. Now I'm suffering from withdrawal symptomps!
I feel jilted! how dare he! someone better tell him to update asap or else, I'mma leave his behind for another...
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