Specifically, it had to do with an undesirable grade - A "B".
I'm used to getting As, not because I'm entitled to it, but because I actually work for it. Throughout my undergrad years, I think I got like 4 Bs, and I ranted and raved like no other. my only compensation was....
Anyways, I got a B in a class that I desperately hoped, worked, studied and prayed my ass off for. I guess I wouldn't have felt so bad if I didn't put in much effort. herein lies my problem.
I've had courses where I put in my maximal best effort, only to end up with a B. I've also had courses where I either didn't put in much or I didn't understand the material as well, and I still got a B.
It is beginning to look like my effort doesnt even matter
The most fustrating ones are the Bs that are 2-3 points shy of an "A" - which is what sent me spiralling down that depressing path from my last post. A "C" wouldn't even have had this much of an effect on me!
Anyways, Whenever there's a problem, you have to face it head on, and attack it.
1. the first step is: Acknowledging that there is a problem.
Now I'm past the denial stage, I think I have a problem. Actually, I think I have ADHD (really, this is not funny). seriously, Dr. Naaps, will you write me a prescription for Aderall if I ask nicely?
2. the next step is: Seek help.
there are two types of help
a. spiritual help: Actually, one of my friends jokingly said I need prayer. Now that I think about it, I really think I need prayers. I was at the Festival of life (naija peeps know it as Holy Ghost service) and pastor Adeboye said we should raise our scarfs, handkerhiefs so that he can pray on it, I think I'll be needing mines for my exams from henceforth!
b. professional help: So I went to see one of the professional somebodys in my school that you go see when you have academic trouble. when I told her my case, she started laughing (schew! like it was funny). Anyways, I have an appointment to go see her this week cos i need to know what I'm doing wrong.
thanks for all your uplifting comments, the only cure for me now is to see those "As" rolling in! or maybe I should just accept my diagnosis of ADHD and stop raising my hopes?
24 comments:
I think many of us can relate to that situation where you work your butt off and get a lower grade than expected, but hopefully those situations are balanced out by the times when you don't give something your best effort and your grade is higher what you planned for and would have expected.
I like your plan. I know some of us have already put you in their prayers and now that you've asked, will continue to say a little prayer for you when we think of you. I think it's great too that you weren't afraid to go to a professional, even though she did laugh at first. I'm sure she's used to dealing with students who are contemplating being kicked out of a program or the school, but once she sees the importance of your grades and how they relate to the big picture that is your future, I hope she'll be able to give you some practical tips to manage it all.
From where I'm sitting, I think you're doing an amazing job, but I know it's most important for you to believe that and feel it so I hope you do soon.
Chin up! The humour in this entry makes me think you're already on your way back up!
Depression can be postponed?! I wish someone woulda told me this earlier!!! I would have...... in fact, never mind sef.
Babes, sorry na. Wetin u want make I talk again? Ndo. It will be okay. You will get your As, okay love?
ADHD ke? From where? you should come to me for professional help. Trust me, i promise not to laugh. Na only flog i go flog u, that's all. You will be cured of ur "A" love affair sharp sharp!
Vera, where d hell did u come from? Stealing my number 2 spot. Take time oh. You dey find my trouble.
What is ADHD? Anyway just keep trying
P.S B isn’t so bad
thought i was 2nd where did u guys come from?
pele love. i wish i know wot 2 say it make it all go away, but alas i don't. i was one of those students who felt damn lucky if i got all Bs. like how e manage happen? lol. it's well. just take it easy sha.
this your post was very funny to me o! whenever I got an A in Uni, I used to kill fowl. lol I understand you sha, sont worry lovey you'll be just alright.
Go get your straight As.
Take it easy o!
Its great to strive for perfection always but then we also have to accept it when we dont meet our own expectations. Life itself isnt perfect.
You go babes!
cheer up darl, glad to see ur handling it well by seeking help. God answers prayer and urs wont be an exception. I understand how annoying it can be when u work hard for something and dont meet ur expectations. It's well. P.s- we r like ur family here thats y u felt u owe us an explanation. Much luv
That happened to me once I was so angry my mother kept telling me to calm down I still get pissed thinking about it.
But don't worry it shall be well.
like doll i also dunno what ADHD means o...does that make me a non-efico?
i see where u r coming from...i can only relate this to working hard for something and not getting the results u expected..not necessary an A (it could be a C for some people..lol)
God dey ur side...and depression is not ur portion
LMAO!!! I'm laughing o, like that your school professional.
You finally got off the cross, praise the Lord.
You're also self diagnosing ADHD and even self prescribing? Oh ye of little faith.
i know what u mean bout workin so hard n the result is beyond what u expect..just take it easy love..God dey..
aloted & doll...ADHD means attention deficit hyperactivity disorder.
but em, bumight, i dnt think u can have adhd and still be getting a's. u see that u dnt even need us to get back on ur feet....we r proud of u jare!
It can be so depressing to have a "B" after all the effort, prayers and giving it your best. I call such situations unconsolable...
Some day you will have your kids coming to you to talk about such situations and you will be able to empathise with them because you actually experienced it. You will be able to give them the right words of motivation and encouragement.
BTW, you are not the grade. You still remain intelligent and exceptional Bumight!
Please do not lose fire...the B is just a distraction...pele
Wonder why u're not cool with a B when ur name starts with one! Na wa o!
Maybe dis is a case of ADHD indeed!
Oya come, make i soothe d blues away....
I guessed right...
You'll be fine sweetie. Personally, I see the A's rolling in from this point henceforth. I think prayers are a good thing, but you also have to supplement the prayers with the hard-work. I'm not quite sure about sending handkerchiefs to pastor Adeboye before every exam though...lol, just pray and believe.
One thing that I know would help is: forget the past, place your trust and hope in a better tomorrow. The past is done with...you already got the B, so just look forward to A's.
I'm currently taking a break from med sch but I've been in the place where I was 2 points shy from the cut off mark (yeah, in med sch)...so I can say I understand. But God saw it before I saw it, and He knew why He allowed it to happen...sooooo...it can only be for a testimony in the future. :)
ADHD - good excuse, I think I will definetely use that soon! I am tired o. I am completely tired. there is so much to be done... Pele work harder and work berra. You will be fine.
I actually felt like I was reading a blog about my life as an undergrad. I feel your pain. I have you in my prayers. I have special connection to baba God. I am the only one he listens to ;-) Don't worry, love. It will all work out in the end. I know this is cliche, but be comforted in the fact that you are reaching for the moon, It's okay to land amongst the stars. Don't beat yourself up about it.
so go get the A's! nothing else i say will help yea?
been there as well.
lol @ postponing your depression till after exams! u can even remote-control it! lucky u.
What do you need? Just A's. Thatz not a problem, I can help you get them A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A A. (Just kidding). Don't worry dear, itz gonna be ok
Lol @ fineboy agbero's comment.
Anyway, believe me I feel you a lot. Been there a few times myself when I was in school. Especially when you're just a few marks shy of the desired grades.
Glad you intend seeking help.
All the best. xxx
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